Obama on business: free markets and magic buttons!

Business Roundtable Q&A

At the Business Roundtable luncheon, 3/12/2009; Obama gave an address and answered some questions. During the Q&A he explained his overarching economic policy:

Uhhh… I am a strong believer in the ability of the free market to generate wealth and prosperity that’s shared [karate chop motion] across the board [karate chop again].

Got that you greedy capitalists? You can create as much wealth and prosperity as you want as long as you share it. Hee-yah! Karate chop!

He goes on to explain the world financial system:

Uhhh…so government has to intervene in a crisis but the goals should always be to right that shift. And… let private enterprise do its magic… uhhh…there are a series of fairly complex issues around regulation in the financial markets which we believe…uhhh…is necessary. I think we’ve got ummmm…ehh…and I assume that many of the people here agree that we’ve got to update…uhhh…the regulatory framework that was created in the 30’s for global markets where trillions of dollars are spinning around the globe with the press of a button.[spinning motion with hands… wheeeee]

What is this amazing button of which he speaks that sends the trillions spinning around the globe? We keep it in the oval office …Ooops… Hillary already gave that button to the Russians.

VIDEO: Wrong red button

She handed him a palm-sized box wrapped with a bow. Lavrov opened it and pulled out the gift—a red plastic button on a black base with a Russian word “peregruzka” printed on top.

“We worked hard to get the right Russian word. Do you think we got it?” Clinton said as reporters, allowed in to observe the first few minutes of the meeting, watched.

“You got it wrong,” Lavrov said, to Clinton’s clear surprise. Instead of "reset," he said the word on the box meant “overcharge.”

This what I think they did with all the stimulus money – they stuffed it in a satellite. Get it? It’s like THE button, only, instead of dropping nuclear bombs on the Russians, it will drop trillions of dollars on their heads… from space. Or something.

We are so screwed.